Just be happy you were invited.

Only in San Francisco will you hear a story of someone boycotting Thanksgiving dinner because a turkey is being cooked. Seriously. I got word of this from a friend today, to protect the innocent I won’t name names. But this friend, we’ll call him John, decided to have Thanksgiving at his house this year. John invites a ton of people over, mostly vegetarians, but turns out there are a few folks coming who eat meat and would love a real turkey. Imagine that--a real turkey on Thanksgiving Day. So John decides to cook one up, despite that fact that he’ll probably eat the Tofurkey, he’s a good host that John, really accommodating. Well someone’s feelings got hurt, it turns out one of the friends of the people who asked for a real turkey in the first place is vegan. Once he caught wind of a real bird being cooked he decided to boycott John’s Thanksgiving Day meal. If you ask me they’re all probably better off with out the vegan there anyway. Some vegans take themselves a little too seriously. Especially the real preachy ones, it hasn’t happened in a while, but when I worked at a non-profit I came across a lot more of them. When they go on and on about how much better they are then you for not using any animal products I want to just rip their leather shoes off and stick some rotting pork in their mouths. To be clear, I heart many vegans, but I like the ones who can watch their boyfriend eat a double beef burrito and laugh when he says he might have to throw up. I don’t know any vegans who would boycott a meal at my house because I chose to cook meat, especially on Thanksgiving Day. My mom made a Turducken two years ago on Christmas day when I was a vegetarian. Did I cry? No, because we don’t do that where I’m from. Back on the east coast you suck it up and sit at the table with carnivores. I love this city. But only here will you hear about a vegan boycotting a thanksgiving meal because a turkey was being cooked.